I used to want to say that to the waiters and fast food cashiers after placing my order. When I'd order the combo meal along with an extra item...or two. When I'd get the largest meal and then ask for a side of something. When I would try to eat what my family didn't finish before the waiter got back with the check...and ultimately would get busted and face that look of "holy crap, he just ate everyone's food" from the waiter. Everyone of these scenarios would lead me to having that thought of wanting to tell them that. I never did though. Now I can look back and realize it was not them who was in disbelief of all the food I was ordering...it was me. My own tiny voice, the voice which is now my dominant one, was trying to talk sense to glutton Mike. Unfortunately, I would ignore it and try escaping all my problems with that huge meal.
Nowadays, I still find myself wanting to say "Yes, I just ordered that...so what of it?!", but for different reasons. When I see their face as this large dude orders a salad. When I choose a tilapia filet over hot wings. When I ask if they can give me broccoli instead of french fries. It's not every waiter or cashier that makes that face of "seriously?" or "oh, he must be on a diet...hehehe", but there have been a couple of 'em. I'm sure eventually I will see that no one ever thought those things. Most likely it is just my insecurities getting the best of me. I'd like to think that maybe these strangers that are taking my order are actually thinking "smart choice".
At the end of the meal though, it doesn't mean a thing whatever anyone may or may not think. What matters is that I didn't order fried chicken and deep fried cheese Saturday and instead chose grilled tilapia and veggies. What matters is on Sunday I chose grilled chicken salad in lieu of a loaded calzone. What matters is that I am finally listening to myself and choosing to eat the right foods that will lead to weight loss and a new life gained.
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