For years, 32 to be exact, I have been saturated with weight loss ideology. At 4 years old I was put in to the hospital to have my thyroid checked due to my weight. After the all clear was given, my mom was instructed to put me on a diet. Obviously that worked and I was a healthy weight the rest of my life. NOPE, NOT EVEN CLOSE.
During Childhood I had the servings counted out for my packed lunch and was told no chocolate milk. So of course, I craved chocolate milk like the other kids and would get it anyway. I was told I couldn't have anything from the ice cream truck, but mom would feel guilty and we'd be at Dairy Queen that weekend. I was kept on a strict calorie count...until we went out to a big dinner. My favorite childhood memory has to be the weekly Weight Watcher meeting. I mean, what 11 year old boy doesn't love attending a weight loss group mostly geared towards woman at that time. If I had a weight loss, we would celebrate with a Columbo Frozen yogurt (conveniently located next door to Weight Watchers) after the meeting. Finally, there was the hypnosis session that my mom and I had. I would stare at my thumb and repeat "I am calm and in control" when I craved food and that was supposed to be my trigger phrase to turn off all my food cravings. This was accompanied by listening to a tape as I went to sleep that would subconsciously reiterate this weight loss habit.With the exception of ONE summer, I never lost my weight as a kid/teen yet always was on a diet.
Flash forward to adulthood. Rice cakes, oatmeal, diet soda and tuna. These were what I was always told would lead to weight loss. Then I was told to try bee pollen pills. A guy I worked with in my early 20s told me about Dexatrim pills and eating nothing but Slim Fast shakes. A few years later I was a follower of Dr. Atkins and the low carb bonanza. I've counted points on the new WW. I even got a staple put in each ear to suppress my appetite. All that one did was make it hurt when I chewed. With all of these things I have done, I had success with all of them to some extent, but it was only temporary.
So now at 36 and just a few months removed from 412 pounds, I realize this weight loss thing is way more than just food and exercise for me.
I took the time to think before I planned the first meal or walking route. After watching countless weight loss shows, I finally listened to the people on them. Instead of just glancing at a headline about obesity in the news, I read the story...and even Googled a little more info. For years I had heard experts say you need to find out why you turn to food to successfully lose weight. I didn't think there was any reason, I just always said I loved food. I was wrong.
I realized all the personal issues I have had in my past. All the insecurity and being treated like crap by others for my weight growing up and as an adult. Things I would hear as a child regarding my weight when school clothes shopping with mom. The deaths of loved ones that happened early in adulthood. For every one of these instances and memories, food was there to release those wonderful endorphins as I enjoyed every calorie filled bite to comfort me. Now that the cat is out of the bag, it has allowed me to know before I turn to food why I am tempted to and to find another thing to fill that void and soothe those bad feelings.
I know this was long winded, but I wanted to share this. For years I was led to believe that if I had willpower and watched my calories I would lose weight. It was only after I realized that no willpower can hold back emotional stress caused eating that I started to find this easier. I'm not saying I have this obesity thing kicked and will be 200 pounds in 6 months. I will say that I am more confident then ever that knowing why I turn to food keeps me from turning to food most of the time now. It also helps when I reflect on the list in my head of what I won't miss about being overweight and what I can't wait to do once I am physically able to.
Now that I have my mind in shape, I am better equipped to get my body in shape. The phrase is "work smarter not harder", but with weight loss a better phrase would be "work smarter and harder".
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