And so it goes, just when I think I got my eating routine down I slip up. It started out great. Dropped the kids off at school, took my final exam that I've been stressing over (and passed ;0), avoided all the fast food on the way back home and then I walked in the house. Since I had the day off work and knew I'd be home alone, I knew there would be temptation to eat bad out of habit/boredom/etc. I did not realize that I would hold strong until 11am and then have a ferocious inner beast take control and ravage the kitchen. In my almost blacked out state of eating through the day, I have surely hurt the progress made over the last 4 days. Just for the sake of documenting my self destruction, let me list the no-no foods that I managed to sniff out and consume: chocolate chip ice cream (with peanut butter on top), one plain bagel w/cream cheese, way too many pistachios and two sandwiches for dinner. Shame, disappointment and general ticked offness (yes, that's not a word, but it fits) sums up my mood.
As stated previously, this won't keep me from moving forward. I got a new work weight loss contest starting tomorrow and the town's weight loss contest begins for me Saturday. There will be a lot of motivation to keep on track, but today certainly was a setback. That's about all I got tonight. I know it will be better tomorrow and hopefully my positive, confident demeanor will return by then. Take care friends.
Mike
Monday, April 30, 2012
Saturday, April 28, 2012
Good outweighed the bad...
This beautiful day led us to Cumberland Falls to spend a little over an hour walking around the park. Unfortunately, I am still too out of shape to attempt the trails, but I got plenty of exercise just walking the paths and stairs. A big part of us going there is the gift shop. Both Chloe and her brother like seeing what unique items they have. They also usually like to get some rock candy. At 63 calories and 12g of sugar, it really isn't the worst thing Chloe could grab as a treat as long as she just got one. They usually end up thrown out before ever fully consumed anyway. Unfortunately, Chloe broke bad and chose the heaping soft serve ice cream cone at the snack bar across the path. The nudging and disapproving looks I threw at her (at her request I remind you) were completely ignored. Than the guilt set in about halfway. As I sat with my diet Ale81 soda, Chloe began to realize that ice cream was not gonna get her to the goals she has set. I was so proud when she chucked the remaining cone in the trash...as did Austin.
After we left the Falls, we went to our town's walking path near downtown. We proceeded to walk an additional 2 miles on top of the 1 mile at the falls. Sure we felt like we were going to succumb to the heat and fatigue, but we feel like a million bucks right now! For dinner I fixed us taco soup, which was more like chili to me, from a weight watcher recipe online. It is awesome and very good for you without tasting very good for you. The link to the recipe is below.
As my post title says, the good things we did today far outweighed the bad. This weight loss thing is not easy for us, but we keep fighting no matter the missteps along the way. I cannot guarantee in an hour I won't eat something stupid...but I can guarantee that I will pick up the pieces and keep heading to my goal if I do. One day (or in my case, one hour) at a time is the only way to succeed. My past failures further reinforce that motto. Don't hesitate to leave a comment, we would love to see some feedback. Hopefully if you are on a weight loss journey you will get with us and we can all help each other out!
Mike
Recipe link for Taco Soup WW style: http://www.food.com/recipe/weight-watchers-low-fat-taco-soup-157732
After we left the Falls, we went to our town's walking path near downtown. We proceeded to walk an additional 2 miles on top of the 1 mile at the falls. Sure we felt like we were going to succumb to the heat and fatigue, but we feel like a million bucks right now! For dinner I fixed us taco soup, which was more like chili to me, from a weight watcher recipe online. It is awesome and very good for you without tasting very good for you. The link to the recipe is below.
As my post title says, the good things we did today far outweighed the bad. This weight loss thing is not easy for us, but we keep fighting no matter the missteps along the way. I cannot guarantee in an hour I won't eat something stupid...but I can guarantee that I will pick up the pieces and keep heading to my goal if I do. One day (or in my case, one hour) at a time is the only way to succeed. My past failures further reinforce that motto. Don't hesitate to leave a comment, we would love to see some feedback. Hopefully if you are on a weight loss journey you will get with us and we can all help each other out!
Mike
Recipe link for Taco Soup WW style: http://www.food.com/recipe/weight-watchers-low-fat-taco-soup-157732
Friday, April 27, 2012
We are back!
Been way too long, but the blog is alive and well. School is winding down for both of us, so the long absences of posting are over.
Here is the jist of whats been going on:
For every day of healthy eating, we had about 1 1/2 days of eating crap. Only one day of exercise and did not drink our water enough. Tuesday 5/1, we weigh in to see our 3/5 - 5/1 results. Right now I am about 7 pounds down, but Chloe hasn't weighed.
Today I completely took hold of new found motivation that flared up two days ago. After sitting with my mom for the 80th time at our local hospital Wednesday (infection, she'll be okay, enough on that), I felt I was looking at my future. She is a diabetic, has heart disease and hypertension, had a strok, cancer, heart stints, double bypass, eye surgeries, neurapothy and countless infections and muscle/joint issues. It is by God's grace that she heals up farely decent and still is self sufficient.
I could easily have these same problems if I follow the same path. With my weight though, an early death is more likely.
So today, I recommitted to eating veggies, fruits, lean meats and swearing off junk, fried foods and sugar filled foods. The kids and I went for a little over 1 mile walk to start a fitness regimen into our plans.
Chloe hasn't quite rekindled the same drive to get back on track. After some negativity was vented from her, she conceded she too needed to be back on track. She told me I have to keep her on track and encourage/scold her when needed. I let her know that works both ways.
On May 5th We are joining a "Biggest Loser" type contest our town is hosting. It runs through 8/11 and person with highest % lost wins $1000. My prize will be losing weight. I will also be in another work contest and will actually do my best this time.
So that is the skinny on where we have been and where we are. Stay tuned to see where all that is taking us. Take care and talk to you soon.
Mike
Here is the jist of whats been going on:
For every day of healthy eating, we had about 1 1/2 days of eating crap. Only one day of exercise and did not drink our water enough. Tuesday 5/1, we weigh in to see our 3/5 - 5/1 results. Right now I am about 7 pounds down, but Chloe hasn't weighed.
Today I completely took hold of new found motivation that flared up two days ago. After sitting with my mom for the 80th time at our local hospital Wednesday (infection, she'll be okay, enough on that), I felt I was looking at my future. She is a diabetic, has heart disease and hypertension, had a strok, cancer, heart stints, double bypass, eye surgeries, neurapothy and countless infections and muscle/joint issues. It is by God's grace that she heals up farely decent and still is self sufficient.
I could easily have these same problems if I follow the same path. With my weight though, an early death is more likely.
So today, I recommitted to eating veggies, fruits, lean meats and swearing off junk, fried foods and sugar filled foods. The kids and I went for a little over 1 mile walk to start a fitness regimen into our plans.
Chloe hasn't quite rekindled the same drive to get back on track. After some negativity was vented from her, she conceded she too needed to be back on track. She told me I have to keep her on track and encourage/scold her when needed. I let her know that works both ways.
On May 5th We are joining a "Biggest Loser" type contest our town is hosting. It runs through 8/11 and person with highest % lost wins $1000. My prize will be losing weight. I will also be in another work contest and will actually do my best this time.
So that is the skinny on where we have been and where we are. Stay tuned to see where all that is taking us. Take care and talk to you soon.
Mike
Tuesday, March 20, 2012
Happy Spring Time!
Sorry for the long delay, but work and school has filled the schedule book. Chloe and I have continued to eat smart (for the most part) since my last post. I am currently down about 8 pounds and Chloe is down 4, but I swear our clothes fit us much better than those numbers would let on. We are still taking things one meal at a time. Now that spring weather is here we hope to increase our activity. Unfortunately our work and school schedules will hinder that until early May. I'm sure we will be able to squeeze in at least 3 or 4 walks a week though until that time. Sorry to be so brief, but I am wore out and I know if I write any more than this it will just be my usual rambling, lol. Hope everyone is doing well and feel free to leave a comment to show support or if you need some encouragement yourself on your weight loss journey. Take care.
Mike
Mike
Monday, March 5, 2012
Just like Gene Autrey...
I'm back in the saddle again. Sure it took us weeks to get my head straight and bad food cravings under control, but at least it happened. This morning the desire to get healthy was off the charts. Memories of last year's weight loss and eventual self destruction came to my mind. Instead of looking at it as a failure, I am encouraged in knowing I/we can do it and that we know the right way to do it. My only negative I will post is my weight. I am at my highest weight ever, 413 pounds. But me and the kids, both Chloe and my son Austin are doing a healthy eating contest. Weight loss percentage will be a factor, but also how we eat and exercised will be big on who wins. Next week we will post our week 1 progress. Before that time comes though Chloe and I will aim at giving a update to keep us on course. Thats all I got for now. Take care friends and thanks for the comments and emails of support!
Sunday, February 26, 2012
What's new...
Nothing. Since we have no news of massive weight loss or intense workouts, this post (and blog in general) has grown quite boring. It isn't the blogs fault though. Really, it isn't necessarily a bad thing either. Many a weight loss blog has gone dormant due to the author(s) simply throwing in the towel on the whole weight loss journey. The fact that I sit here typing is still evidence there is fight left in us. Enough of this blogging reflection, let me get you up to speed on me and Chloe.
At 7pm last night, I was eating boneless wings, steak, wonton tacos and my son's fries at Applebee's restaurant. Chloe was sharing the wings with me and eating her chicken penne pasta. I devoured all of mine along with food from other plates, while Chloe took over half of her dinner home. The ride home I experienced the same guilt, frustration and crappy filled to the brim glutton feelings that I have had thousands of times before. While I was dealing with that, Chloe was entering her calories into her My Fitness Pal app on her phone. This is just a one meal snapshot, but more and more meals lately have been like this. I self destruct for an hour while Chloe does damage but stays relatively close to her target calories.
From this point on, this post is all about me. Chloe is doing good besides me setting her up for bad meals...hopefully the next few moments of writing this will lead me to a solution to stop doing that to us.
The desire and motivation are there, but the implementation of following through my previously tried and true eating habits has ceased to occur. I have purchased the big boy workout apparel, good training shoes and a kitchen full of healthy veggies, fruits and lean protein sources...but the clothing sits, the shoes like new and the food inching towards the expiration dates. It has become a new routine to eat out or get carry out orders in lieu of cooking at home. Obviously the choices for healthy options can be made, but my old thought process causes me to select "good stuff" instead of what I could make at home. Unfortunately the "good stuff" is what is leading me to risks of diabetes, heart disease, stroke and dying a way too soon death. Yet, those thoughts are but a fleeing thought as the plate of (insert decadent deliciousness here) sits in front of me.
I never considered myself an emotional eater. Stories of those eating to stifle their pain and depression fill the internet and self help shows on television. I honestly do not have anything going on or from my past that I dwell on that much to need pain stifling. We all have had bad stuff happen to us. Family members die, marriages have rocky times, work stress builds and other everyday life issues happen to us all. Not everyone reacts by being gluttonous, but when a fat person eats a double Whopper they must be in pain according to the experts. So right off the bat, I am denouncing the emotional eating as a cause for my meal meltdowns.
Compulsive eating? Well, I don't sit and graze all day on food. Typically I eat a bad dinner and maybe a crappy side item with my otherwise healthy lunch. Although, I could watch Food TV all day and potentially eat at every place they visit. But I don't think about eating all the time. I have been known to eat out for lunch and dinner, picking bad choices at both. Maybe I am a 25% compulsive eater since I do have a habit to graze on my wife's leftovers (since only about 3 bites actually fills her up).
So I still sit here typing and expressing my thoughts here on this blog, hoping you are not too bored reading this rambling, and continue to wonder where my issue lies. Is it the fact I have been put on a diet since I was 4 and am now just sick of it? Is it the defeated feeling I have for letting myself get this big and feeling like it is impossible to lose so much weight? Is it wanting a plate of food more than wanting to work for weight loss? Do I live to eat instead of eat to live? Honestly, as I type those questions out and look at them I think it could be a little of all those things, especially the first two. Even though this needs to be a lifestyle change and not a diet, the years of dieting along with my current weight and reflection in the mirror just makes me want to throw something. So going back to the emotional eating subject up above, maybe it really is a bit of emotional eating when I throw healthy eating out the window. All I know is that if I don't get this figured out soon, this will all be for nothing since I will be 6 feet under. People at my weight do not live long and I am not foolish enough to think that I am different.
As I have said in this blog several times, and in my previous blog a hundred times, today is a new day. I have no idea what lies ahead of me, but there are things in my life I can control. It's making the right choice that has been the issue, but today and going forward I can do things right. Hope my next post is shorter and not as in depth, but this blog is a tool to help me and Chloe too, and laying it all out there sometimes is the best way to help one's self find the answers. Take care friends.
Mike
At 7pm last night, I was eating boneless wings, steak, wonton tacos and my son's fries at Applebee's restaurant. Chloe was sharing the wings with me and eating her chicken penne pasta. I devoured all of mine along with food from other plates, while Chloe took over half of her dinner home. The ride home I experienced the same guilt, frustration and crappy filled to the brim glutton feelings that I have had thousands of times before. While I was dealing with that, Chloe was entering her calories into her My Fitness Pal app on her phone. This is just a one meal snapshot, but more and more meals lately have been like this. I self destruct for an hour while Chloe does damage but stays relatively close to her target calories.
From this point on, this post is all about me. Chloe is doing good besides me setting her up for bad meals...hopefully the next few moments of writing this will lead me to a solution to stop doing that to us.
The desire and motivation are there, but the implementation of following through my previously tried and true eating habits has ceased to occur. I have purchased the big boy workout apparel, good training shoes and a kitchen full of healthy veggies, fruits and lean protein sources...but the clothing sits, the shoes like new and the food inching towards the expiration dates. It has become a new routine to eat out or get carry out orders in lieu of cooking at home. Obviously the choices for healthy options can be made, but my old thought process causes me to select "good stuff" instead of what I could make at home. Unfortunately the "good stuff" is what is leading me to risks of diabetes, heart disease, stroke and dying a way too soon death. Yet, those thoughts are but a fleeing thought as the plate of (insert decadent deliciousness here) sits in front of me.
I never considered myself an emotional eater. Stories of those eating to stifle their pain and depression fill the internet and self help shows on television. I honestly do not have anything going on or from my past that I dwell on that much to need pain stifling. We all have had bad stuff happen to us. Family members die, marriages have rocky times, work stress builds and other everyday life issues happen to us all. Not everyone reacts by being gluttonous, but when a fat person eats a double Whopper they must be in pain according to the experts. So right off the bat, I am denouncing the emotional eating as a cause for my meal meltdowns.
Compulsive eating? Well, I don't sit and graze all day on food. Typically I eat a bad dinner and maybe a crappy side item with my otherwise healthy lunch. Although, I could watch Food TV all day and potentially eat at every place they visit. But I don't think about eating all the time. I have been known to eat out for lunch and dinner, picking bad choices at both. Maybe I am a 25% compulsive eater since I do have a habit to graze on my wife's leftovers (since only about 3 bites actually fills her up).
So I still sit here typing and expressing my thoughts here on this blog, hoping you are not too bored reading this rambling, and continue to wonder where my issue lies. Is it the fact I have been put on a diet since I was 4 and am now just sick of it? Is it the defeated feeling I have for letting myself get this big and feeling like it is impossible to lose so much weight? Is it wanting a plate of food more than wanting to work for weight loss? Do I live to eat instead of eat to live? Honestly, as I type those questions out and look at them I think it could be a little of all those things, especially the first two. Even though this needs to be a lifestyle change and not a diet, the years of dieting along with my current weight and reflection in the mirror just makes me want to throw something. So going back to the emotional eating subject up above, maybe it really is a bit of emotional eating when I throw healthy eating out the window. All I know is that if I don't get this figured out soon, this will all be for nothing since I will be 6 feet under. People at my weight do not live long and I am not foolish enough to think that I am different.
As I have said in this blog several times, and in my previous blog a hundred times, today is a new day. I have no idea what lies ahead of me, but there are things in my life I can control. It's making the right choice that has been the issue, but today and going forward I can do things right. Hope my next post is shorter and not as in depth, but this blog is a tool to help me and Chloe too, and laying it all out there sometimes is the best way to help one's self find the answers. Take care friends.
Mike
Sunday, February 12, 2012
Hello Everyone...
I know it has been a long time since our last update, but it's been hectic. School and work have been way harder than last semester and Chloe's schoolwork has required more time as well. Unfortunately we have fallen into the snacking while studying trap and choosing not so good meal options. Even though the desire and attention to weight loss remains there, the strong motivation weakens more often than we'd like. Not cooking as often has been a deterrent, along with purchasing cheaper foods that are not good weight loss choices. So with vacation less than 6 months away, I am stuck in a rut. While Chloe strives to enter calories in her MyFitnessPal app, I end up most days feeling defeated in how I have ate and end up blowing dinner too. I am so proud that Chloe is at least near the right track and feel very ashamed that I have lent a hand in sabotaging her progress. I know what needs to be done to live healthy, lose weight and reach my goals....it's the staying on course and silencing my old self that is the hard part and reason I haven't. I despise how much I love food. Cooking it, eating it and watching shows featuring it. I have not given up though. This blog and this post are a reminder to myself that there is fight left in me to drop this weight.
Today is a new day. I slept late so I have not had a chance to make a bad food decision. So today I will hit the proverbial reset button again and keep moving on this journey. I don't know when I will post next, but I will make an effort to do so within the next week. Take care friends.
Mike
Today is a new day. I slept late so I have not had a chance to make a bad food decision. So today I will hit the proverbial reset button again and keep moving on this journey. I don't know when I will post next, but I will make an effort to do so within the next week. Take care friends.
Mike
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